


what is love? (a disease, probably)

by archimedesprinciple



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, M/M, the mortifying ordeal of being dragged kicking and screaming into a crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:47:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27590890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/archimedesprinciple/pseuds/archimedesprinciple
Summary: If this is a love story, Tobio wants a refund.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 14
Kudos: 118





	what is love? (a disease, probably)

Tobio falls in love on a Thursday, so he buys himself an extra milk carton at the vending machine as recompense for the inevitable and horrible heartbreak that will surely ensue from this. Well, maybe not heartbreak, since he has no plans of ever letting it get that far. Maybe just heart twinges, that sort of thing.

This is a disaster. He is a disaster. His plan so far had been simple: play volleyball, get better. Keep playing volleyball until he has a stroke on the court. That’s how he wants to go – one last serve, one last set to be remembered by, and then immediate death. In Tobio’s opinion it had been a pretty good plan, except now he also wants Hinata Shouyou, which gives him hives just thinking about it. Hinata’s led him around by the nose ever since they met, Tobio can admit in the safety of his own head. It’s annoying as hell and it makes him want to punch the kid to stave him off, except now that he is, officially, in love, it would probably lead to some other stupid impulse like running his fingers through Hinata’s hair or whatever, and then Tobio would have to jump off the roof of the gym to regain his dignity.

Hinata is horrible. He was being horrible at lunch too, yelling about serves with Yamaguchi and spraying rice everywhere, up until Tsukishima reclaimed Yamaguchi’s attention and Hinata reached inside his bag and nudged a milk drink in Tobio’s direction. “Try it, Kageyama, they came out with a new flavor!”

Tobio had reached for it on instinct. “What about you?”

“I tried one already!”

“You didn’t have to…” The drink was sweet on his tongue.

“Duh,” Hinata said, smile wide as always, knees brushing Tobio’s under the table. “Obviously I remembered you.” And that was how it had happened.

Deep in the throes of self-pity, Tobio finally registers someone calling his name. He lifts his head from between his knees to look up at Ennoshita. “Are you okay, Kageyama?”

“Yes,” Tobio immediately answers. Whatever else happens, he will not allow this to affect volleyball.

Because Ennoshita is a benevolent person, he just raises an eyebrow and lets the subject drop. “No extra practice tonight, alright? The practice match yesterday went pretty long, take it easy today.”

“Yes,” Tobio says more reluctantly, and wonders how he should distract himself now.

***

Tobio ends up at a sporting goods store with Hinata, which doesn’t bode well for his future self-control. He’s having fun, unfortunately, because Hinata makes everything fun. Hinata bounces around the store looking at knee pads while Tobio wanders towards the clothing section to unhook some hanging shirts. Hinata wanders back to him, humming under his breath, and Tobio’s gaze naturally flits over to take stock. He’s looking at his phone.

“Who are you texting?” Tobio asks.

“Kenma,” Hinata chirps, not looking up. “He recommended a brand of pads. Hey hey, didn’t you need some new ones?”

Tobio bristles on instinct. “What? No. I can buy my own knee pads. Don’t just take his word for it, you should look at brands yourself.”

“Kenma probably knows just as well as me. I mean, I’m pretty sure he’s been playing longer than I have.”

“I’ve been playing longer than you have, too! You never listen to me!”

“That’s because your only mode of communication is yelling, Bakageyama! You give orders, not suggestions! I don’t like your tone!”

But! Tobio wants to say. You brought me milk! Or have you bought milk for Kozume Kenma as well? Hinata makes so many friends so easily, he probably thinks nothing of it. Tobio was probably having a crisis by himself. That’s right, he remembers now. This is why there won’t be heartbreak, because there won’t be a confession, because it wouldn’t come to anything anyway.

Hinata is looking at him suspiciously. “What? You look like you’re constipated. You need to shit or something?” Tobio reaches out and winds his fingers into Hinata’s hair. It’s soft. His fingers tense without much input from his higher processing functions, and he tugs. Hinata – doesn’t make a sound exactly. Instead, he looks up at Tobio, eyes warm and wide, and huffs out a breath in surprise, lips slightly parted. The tip of his tongue is pink. Tobio’s teeth actually ache for moment. Hinata is very beautiful, Tobio thinks, before he shoves Hinata’s head down, ignoring the furious squawking that ensues, and picks out a black t-shirt from his options.

***

Let’s be clear; Tobio never holds back from volleyball. He never slacks, and he is never off his game. Even after that horrible day, when his sister had told him she was quitting for good, and his grandfather was gone – dead, Tobio, don’t be a coward, dead, dead, in the ground for good – when he had picked up his ball and bounced it off his forearms, desperately hoping he would fumble it, that he would break for a moment and cry and ruin his stupid, unmoving face – even then, he hadn’t missed.

He isn’t missing now, and his sets are as sharp as ever. Hinata is soaring, the upperclassmen are on form, and Tobio’s even managed to inch Tsukishima up a few centimeters for his spike, he’s pretty sure, based on the death glare he feels burning into the side of his head.

They break. Tobio is stretching out his legs, and Hinata joins him. “Wanna stop by the store for buns today?”

Tobio grunts an affirmative and tries to flick his hair out of his eyes as he bends over. He rests his cheek on his arm, propped over his knee, and looks up around the gym. Hinata is lying arms spread-eagled, his legs bent and fleet planted on the gym floor. The edge of his shirt rides up a little, and the muscles of his stomach flex as he breathes. His shorts are slipping up his thighs, forming two small pooled shadows on the ground. Tobio’s hands flash hot and cold. He wants to wrap them around warm skin, and press.

“And then, I got this new game, so do you want to come over to my house?”

“Sure.” He puts his hands around his own thighs. Here you go, asshole, his brain supplies. You stupid disaster.

While he undergoes a brief crisis, Hinata has jumped up and wandered around behind Tobio. Suddenly, there are warms hands pressing down between his shoulder blades. Tobio the stupid disaster stops breathing.

“You should be more careful,” Hinata says, his voice quieter than usual. “You nearly twisted your ankle back there, right? Don’t push yourself. Taking care of your body is part of getting stronger.”

Tobio inhales. His chest hurts. The pressure eases on his back, and he gets a flick to the head. “Seriously. Watch out, or I’m gonna beat you. Then you’ll have to sit out, and I’ll have to learn to set, Kageyama-kun!”

He has to take another breath before he can respond. He is so in love. “Shut up, moron! I’ll believe that when you learn to receive a ball properly.”

“Whateeeeeever. Gimme a toss! I’ll hit it no matter how shitty it is.”

“MY TOSSES ARE NEVER SHITTY, YOU WANNA GO?”

They start playing again. Tobio is still running hot and cold, and his hands are still clenching over air. When Tsukishima jumps up to spike, Tobio puts just a bit too much force into it. Tsukishima still manages to hit it over the net, but the ball flashes nearly too fast past his apex of contact.

Tanaka whistles. “Haven’t seen one of those in a while. Nasty.”

“By all means, don’t hold back, your Majesty,” Tsukishima snaps, probably still annoyed about Tobio making him reach for it earlier. “We’re all just your pawns anyway.”

Tobio freezes, and looks down. He knows Tsukishima doesn’t really mean it anymore, not the way he meant it in first year. It’s fine. Hinata returns a loud, easy jab back at Tsukishima, deflecting attention away, and Ennoshita pats him on the shoulder. Tobio nods in response to his silent question, and practice goes on.

It will be fine, Tobio thinks. He knows that sometimes he’s too much for other people, he expects too much, is too greedy. People can’t always keep up with him. Hinata can, in volleyball. Hinata is his best friend, and will be as long as Tobio can keep his mouth shut about other things. Volleyball is all that really matters anyway. He’ll learn to ignore this. It’ll be fine. His face is something of a blessing this way; people hardly ever know when he’s hiding.

***

“You’re hiding, Kageyama,” Hinata says a few days later. Tobio scrubs a hand down his face, trying to wipe off whatever expression he must have given away. He is seriously done with this whole Hinata thing. Why did he have to crush on the one person with both freakily accurate social perception and zero brain-to-mouth filter? If this is a love story, Tobio wants a refund.

“ _I’m not hiding_. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I don’t know why you’re hiding, but you’ve been off since last week! Was it Tsukishima that time? You know he didn’t really mean it. Also, it’s not a bad thing when your tosses go harder, we all need to train faster reaction times anyway!”

“I don’t care what Tsukishima and his stupid glasses does, because I’m not hiding.” Tobio shoves a hand under Hinata’s when his grip slackens and the meat of his bun wobbles dangerously.

“Then what’s wrong with you? Don’t lie!” Hinata has stopped walking. The weather is getting colder, and his breath gusts out in white wisps. His other hand reaches out to grip Tobio’s wrist where he hasn’t pulled away yet.

“There’s nothing wrong with me,” Tobio says desperately. It’s not cold enough for gloves yet, and he feels like he can’t move his hand away from the warm band circled around it. “Don’t you dare say I’ve been off in practice.”

“Practice has been fine.” Hinata looks at him calmly, the corners of his mouth turned down. “Why won’t you tell me? Aren’t we friends?”

There’s a moment of silence. “Yes,” Tobio says, too slow; he doesn’t sound convincing even to himself. Hinata’s eyes are wide with disappointment. They are very beautiful.

“You— I – I’ll go ahead first,” Hinata says, unsure of himself in a way Tobio hasn’t seen before. Tobio’s wrist is free now. “I’ll see you at school.”

Tobio stands there until the flash of red hair disappears around a fork in the road. He can see his own breath curl out in front of him. Dimly, he is aware of his umbrella sliding out of a crack in his bag, tilted behind his shoulder, and he catches it without thinking. He can taste the sweetness of milk on the bottom of his tongue. Inevitable heartbreak. Tobio never misses, even when he wants to.

Tobio slowly realizes that he is crying now. It feels like a horrible betrayal, that his body chooses this moment to do it. Like his other moments of misery weren’t enough. This is the dumbest possible situation to be crying in. Stop it. Don’t be a coward, Tobio.

“Kageyama!”

His head jerks up so fast a muscle strains. Hinata is ten, five, zero yards in front of him, gasping for breath. His cheeks are red, and so are the corners of his eyes.

“You lied! You’re lying!” Tobio has no idea what he’s saying, but his whole chest is filled with hope right now. He’s back. Why is he back?

“We’re _best_ friends, right?” Hinata says, voice rising. “Right, right?”

“Yes,” Tobio whispers. Please, stay. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean, earlier—”

“I don’t know why you’re sad,” Hinata trills. There is a waver in his voice. “But. I need to tell you something. It might make you feel better? I’m not sure, I don’t know.”

There is a gap of light somewhere in this conversation. “Tell me,” Tobio says quietly. Hinata sucks in another breath, and stops. Neither of them say anything.

Somebody even better will come and find you, his grandfather had promised him. Hinata has given Tobio a lot of things. He is maybe the kindest person Tobio knows. Don’t be a coward.

“I like you,” Tobio says. His tongue feels too big for his throat. He is about to choke on fear, but when did that ever stop him? When he goes, he wants to go out in the middle of the court, at the top of his game. If he’s going to die, he’s going to finish this match first. “I like you. You’re wonderful. I love you, probably. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

Hinata gapes at him. His whole face is slowly turning red. He looks ridiculous, and he is very beautiful. Tobio is getting hives thinking about this, but he will throw himself off the roof of the gym tomorrow.

And then; “I like you too!” Hinata bellows at him, volume control forgotten. “That was what I was going to say! I love you.”

Tobio feels full of light, like he’s swallowed a sun. “Really?”

“Really, really!” Hinata’s mouth is curving up again into a brilliant smile. “I like your tosses, and how tall you are, and how you always stay back to help me!” He wraps his hand around Tobio’s again, but this time he pushes their fingers together until they’re linked, and warm against the cold. He is still holding his meat bun. Tobio is still holding his umbrella. This is the dumbest and greatest moment of Tobio’s life so far.

“Shouyou,” Tobio blurts out. Hinata’s face is so red it’s becoming worrying. His mouth is still parted. Tobio wants to bite down on his lower lip. Can I, can I?

“Tobio,” Hinata says. His grin is so wide his eyes have almost disappeared. “Toss to me tomorrow, okay?” The curl of his mouth points to yes.


End file.
